


Knife's Edge

by a_sin_and_a_lie



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Season/Series 03, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-25
Updated: 2018-08-25
Packaged: 2019-07-02 01:00:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15785730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_sin_and_a_lie/pseuds/a_sin_and_a_lie
Summary: Buffy and Angel try to find a precarious balance in late Season 3. Smut and angst.





	Knife's Edge

They tumbled into the mansion in a burst of energy, Angel tugging Buffy through the door by the hand. She was laughing.

It was misty and damp outside, so Buffy made him wait while she shed her wet jacket and kicked off her boots. Reluctantly he paused to do the same, but as soon as he could, he was pulling her toward his bedroom again.

He went immediately to his bedside table and picked up a book, ruffling through it until he found his bookmark. She sat on the edge of the bed and waited expectantly.

“There it is!” he said. He was smiling so widely she felt her heart expand at the sight.

He handed the book to her, pointing at a spot on the page. “I was just reading about Listorious demons today. I’ve never seen one before. And then we take out three of them in the cemetery tonight. What are the chances?”

Her smile had a certain amount of indulgence in it, but it was genuine all the same. “That’s way too mathletic a question to be asking me this late at night. Or ever.”

She took a last look at the Listorious — yeeesh, it was ugly — before closing the book and handing it back to him as he sat down next to her on the bed. He looked so cute in his excitement that she couldn’t help but lean in to kiss him.

She got to her feet after a quick brush of his lips, knowing that kissing on Angel’s bed was bordering on the dangerous, but he put his hand on her arm and pulled her back in for another, more leisurely, rendition.

They were both smiling when their lips parted. Buffy ran one hand through the hair above Angel’s ear, letting it rest on his neck.

His hands lingered around her hips, holding her in place. As the moment spooled out between them, Buffy felt something warm blooming deep inside her. One more kiss couldn’t hurt. She leaned into him and touched her lips to his, feeling a little thrill when he made this kiss even deeper than the one before.

And maybe it was his good mood or just a lucky break, but when Buffy maneuvered into his lap, one knee on either side of him, he didn't protest. She didn’t want to push it, so she kept some space between their bodies, kept her hands on his face and neck, but he ignored the unwritten rules, sliding his hands over her back and bringing them to rest on the back pockets of her jeans.

Oh, god, it had been so long since they made out like this. She kept telling herself that she would break away after one more minute, one more minute, but the minute to break away didn’t come. Instead, the fire between them kept building, and she found herself more and more enraptured with Angel’s lips, Angel’s arms, Angel’s hands.

She sighed against him as he kissed his way to her neck, driving her to distraction with little nips and tastes of her skin. His fingers curled under the edges of her sweater, brushing coolly over the skin that her low-slung jeans left exposed.

"Buffy. Can I..."

And she knew what she was supposed to say. “We can’t” or “No, Angel, no.” But she breathed out “yes” instead, pulling up on his wrists to lift the material clutched in his hands away from her body.

He pulled her sweater over her head and she quickly undid the buttons down the front of his shirt, leaving his chest bare to her. She crushed herself against him as they kissed. She hadn’t felt his skin against her this way in more than a year. The rush that went through her was unbelievable.

He dipped her back as if they were dancing and lowered his face into her cleavage, nuzzling against every bit of skin peeking out from her lacy pink bra. The feeling of being suspended, of his arms holding her in place as he devoured her, heightened the sensation. She moaned when he sucked at her nipples through the filmy fabric.

Then he was lifting her back up, freeing the clasp nestled between her breasts and pulling the straps from her arms. He stood up, holding her snugly against him as he spun her around and laid her back gently onto the bed, her hair fanning out over the pillow.

He looked at her, his eyes a question. She didn't want him to stop. She didn't even risk speaking out loud for fear of breaking the spell that had fallen over them. They wouldn’t go too far. She’d know when they really had to stop. But now she wanted, she _needed_ , Angel to touch her.

She unbuttoned the fly of her jeans and slid the zipper slowly down, her eyes still locked on his. He bent over and pressed kisses into her belly, skimming his lips just above the waistband of her panties. She was burning so hot now she thought she might melt right through the bed.

He grasped her jeans and tugged them down her body, taking her underwear with them. Now she was completely nude and lying in Angel’s bed. She was starting to worry that this was a dream, but the ache between her thighs felt too sharp, too real, for that.

Angel was next to her now, peppering kisses on her temples and the tip of her nose.

“I dream about you here, like this,” he said softly, cupping her breast and running his thumb over the dark pink tip. “You’re all I want, Buffy.” She bit her lip as he suckled her into his mouth. One of his hands slid down her body to the curve of her hip, his thumb strumming across the swell of her bone.

“You deserve more than I can give you,” he said softly, laying his cheek against her chest. “But I want...to try. You can’t touch me, though...I wouldn’t be able to...” He lifted his head to look into her eyes. “Can you do that?”

“Yes,” she said, her eyes wide. She wasn’t sure.

He seemed to understand what she didn't say. He guided her body until she was lying on her stomach with her hands up under the pillow. “Can you stay like this?”

“Yes,” she said more confidently, grabbing a fistful of sheets in each hand. A delicious, nervous shiver ran through her body. Maybe they were playing with fire, but he would be careful. She knew he would.

He splayed his big hands across her back and massaged her gently until her muscles began to loosen. She felt his mouth against her shoulder blades and then at the small of her back. One of his hands slid over the curve of her ass, squeezing lightly before continuing down between her legs. His fingertips danced over the wetness there and her hips bucked against the mattress.

“Please,” she whispered.

He continued to massage her hip and ass with one hand as the other explored between her thighs. After an almost agonizing wait, she felt his finger slip inside her wet heat and she shifted her hips up to meet him. She began to rock on the bed as he moved inside her, adding a second finger to join the first.

She wanted more and more of him, and together they set a pace that soon had her making incoherent sounds. He was hitting just the right spot within her and she was already teetering on the edge when his other hand found her clit and circled her at the same intense pace.

The tension built up over months of longing peaked and finally burst. Her vision went white as she crashed into bliss. She cried out into the pillow and gripped the sheets tighter as it washed over her.

As she came back to herself, she realized he was quiet and still. She stayed in place, keeping herself from moving, from touching him. When she finally risked turning to look at him, his eyes were closed and his fists clenched. But he sensed her gaze and smiled as his eyes opened. He took a soft blanket from the end of the bed and draped it over her. Then he lay down, cradling her against him. She floated there with stars in her eyes for a while, until she heard his voice, low and tender against her ear.

“Buffy, I’m sorry I couldn’t...with my mouth,” he said. “It would make me too—“

“Frustrated?” she finished understandingly.

“Too happy,” he corrected.

She bit her lip as her entire body reignited. How could he turn her on so much with just a few words?

She knew she was being risky, but she brought one hand out from under the blanket and pulled his face to hers so she could kiss him, feeling raw-edged and needy. He returned the kiss with equal passion for a few minutes and the air around them seemed to crackle with electricity. Then Angel pulled away abruptly, panting as hard as she was, even though he didn’t need to breathe.

“Buffy, I need to—“

She nodded as he practically fled to the bathroom and the embrace of what she knew would be a very cold shower.

When the door closed behind him, Buffy pulled the blanket off, exposing her enflamed body to the cool air. She rolled off the bed and dressed quickly, all the way down to her socks. She padded quietly to the living room for her now-dry boots and her jacket. It was only when she was fully armored that she dared knock on the bathroom door.

“Buffy?” She heard Angel’s muffled voice over the sound of the water.

“Goodnight!” she yelled. She didn’t wait for a response, turning and moving swiftly until the night air enveloped her. She didn’t want to hear his voice, small and sad, telling her that they had made a mistake. That they couldn’t risk it again. She already felt guilty that she’d never be able to give Angel the kind of white-hot pleasure that he had made her feel.

She wandered the rest of the way home slowly, hugging her memories of Angel's touch close to her.

She knew they had been a little stupid, but she couldn’t bring herself to regret it completely. They would just need to keep things PG for a while, until they found the balance again. But they could do this. They could be close without being too close, without crossing the line.

Couldn’t they?


End file.
